rain on tulips

…but just barely! I’m still not in labor. Midwife yesterday said I was somewhere between 1 and 2 cm dilated, and things are a go for a friday morning induction (unless labor and delivery is too busy).

Now, If I could just be comfortable or something. Too much pain and discomfort going on, and I just lost the vision in the middle of my field of vision — either the onset of a migraine — woohoo! — or something worse. Guess I need to call Fuul and figure out what to do.

For those checking in to see if I’m still here, I am.

(At least, as of 8:30 am on Sunday morning!)

Will update as I can, if the situation changes any!

Just me, though. Everyone else seems to be at full-energy-mode!

I’m tired of not sleeping. I’m tired from not sleeping! No matter how late I go to bed, I’m completely awake before 7am. (The other night, I didn’t get to sleep til after 4, and was still up by 7. Ugh!)

I’m tired of hurting. My hip/groin has gotten worse again — I actually had to take a pain pill the other night, because I was hurting even when I was resting. My adhesion/scar pain has been increasing, and its always there as at least a dull stab in the background, if it isn’t full-on flaring pain. My sciatica flares at inconvenient moments, causing my legs to give out at random when I’m walking. And my lower back has more nerve pain than I knew there were nerves there!

I’m tired of the contractions that hurt and stop me in my tracks and make me breathe through them, but don’t seem to be doing anything more than that!

And, though I love that I have been able to work on the hand-finishing of my Penguin Sampler quilt, I’m tired of the blisters and pokes and needle-pricks in my fingers — I finally found something to put around my fingers so I can feel the needle, but I’m not blistering any more. Of course, it does nothing for the back end of the needle slipping under my fingernails and leaving nice little pockets of blood there. Ugh! (The cool part about the Vet Wrap stuff — you know, the stuff they use when you donate blood to hold on the gauze pads? — is that it completely covers your fingers, grips the needle like a little piece of rubber, is flexible, and doesn’t stick to the quilt at all! I only have a little bit left from EK’s hospital stay, so I may have to just invest in some to keep in my quilting supplies! Maybe I can choose some really fun colors this time!?)

I thought it would be nice last night to get some rest, because the 3 older kids all went to sleep over at friends’ homes. The 3 littler kids all went to sleep at decent hours. Me? Didn’t fall asleep til after 1, then EK was up again fussing with a stuffy nose. Just can’t win!

So… tired, tired, tired. Maybe this is just prep-work for when I add in a newborn who likely won’t sleep longer than a couple hours at a stretch anyway, yes??

Today was the first full day EK and I were on our own since coming home from the hospital on Sunday. The kids have been off school M-W for ‘Midwinter Break’, so I’ve had them around to help out with EK and keep her entertained. Of course, it also meant that I didn’t really get any shopping done, because its a much bigger job to take all of them to the store at once.

So, today EK and I finally got to the grocery store (we really aren’t low on too much stuff, because people have been bringing in dinners for most of 2 weeks — but the milk and cereal and lunch supplies were running low). I think if I had walked into Labor and Delivery with the contractions I was having while we walked around, we probably could have had this little Tiebreaker today!

Its a strange sensation, knowing that — up to a certain point — the date and time of delivery is rather up to me, and when I am ready to say ‘enough’ and ask the midwife to do something about it. I’m scheduled for next Friday, but if I walked in like that, they’d do something sooner, I’m sure.

Instead, though, I came home and put away the groceries and ran another couple of loads of laundry, and packed a bag for the hospital — an absolute guarantee that the contractions would let up! LOL

GC is going to a birthday party tonight, and AE has Achievement Days. And I have to cook dinner for the first time in weeks… not a clue what to fix! (We have some extra chicken left from dinners being brought in, so I thought we might do a pasta/chicken something, or a chicken/noodle something, or — JS’s suggestion — Chicken Tortilla soup. (But, we’ve had mexican like 4 times this week; I think we need a break for a day or so!))

Ah, the glamorous life of the 9-months pregnant woman… ack!!

We’ve been home 2 full days now, and we are starting to feel a little more settled. Friends from church have taken all the older kids (sans EK) for a couple of hours each afternoon, and they are still bringing in dinners (tonight is the last night for that), so we are trying to use this time to ease back into a nice routine.

The hard part, I guess, is trying to get EK back onto a good, normal schedule. She got used to being catered to while she was at the hospital (we couldn’t let her down on the floor to play, so she got the impression that if she wants something, she should get it immediately, and she still gets upset if either Fuul or I are holding one of the other kids — just what we need right before we have a new one that is going to need to be held a lot, huh?). She also got the rude awakening of not getting a bottle anymore — she only got about 4 a day — one for breakfast, 2 for naps, and one at bedtime; but with her not being allowed any fluids by mouth, thats right out. Nothing like going cold turkey, huh?

There is also the issue that, when she needed a bottle, we could put her in her swing, or sit her somewhere, and giver her her bottle. Well, she gets 5 feedings a day now thru her tube (I’ve dropped the night-time drip because she was having too much ‘junky’ noise in her throat when she slept with the drip), but she has to be tethered to the pump the whole time (and it has a very short tube — a new pet peeve!) and we have to watch to make sure she doesn’t bite it or pull it out or open the plug. So, it takes a lot more supervision than a bottle did. Eats into time a lot more.

The other kids are doing ok with this transition. I think they like having all the outside attention — Monday, my friend H. took them to lunch and to see Curious George and to her house to make cupcakes. Doesn’t get much better than that, huh? And, DA took the time last night to ask about and watch how we set up the pump to feed EK her formula — at least he is prepared if we have to run off abruptly. He couldn’t reset her NG tube or anything, but he could hook her up and run the thing and unhook it if he had to. That’s a plus!

I finally figured out how I am going to quilt my Penguin Sampler quilt yesterday, and got it all marked — well, all but the outside border. I don’t know what I’m going to do there as of yet, but at least the middle is all marked, and I was able to start in on it last night. Didn’t get nearly as much stitched as I had hoped, but it is started, and that’s always a good thing! I still need to figure out what I’m going to do with the Orange Star quilt I started for Tiebreaker. Good news on the quilting front: Mom took the Butterfly Pinwheel quilt back for my friend, who had her baby in January. (But, I realized last night that I never did get a picture of that one. I may have to send Mom over to their house to get a picture for me!)

Spent most of the day yesterday nursing a sore hip (still, not bad, but not gone either); heartburn (ugh — that’s a new one!); a backache (owie! gets worse with contractions); and a baby who is threatening to make an appearance before our scheduled induction date. I am scared to death of giving birth this time; thats a new state, and I’m not certain how to deal with it. Usually, I’m mostly excited, with a tiny bit of apprehension thrown in for good measure. This time, its more like sheer terror, and every once in a while I remember that we’re getting a cute new bundle out of the whole thing!

Can’t they just knock me out cold and wake me when its all over? I’d volunteer to go now, and they can just keep me absolutley sedated until its all over!

Ugh!!

another installment…

(more…)

EK came home from the hospital this evening, and we are so glad to have her home! (She even survived the mob of kids wanting to hug her and kiss her and carry her around!)

We are home with a tube feeding setup — ugh — but home none-the-less. And the last Dr that was in let us come home on a bolus-feeding regimen, so, while she is attached to the tubes for 10 hours straight during the night, during the day, we do 3 half-hour feedings, and she can remain unencumbered by all the paraphernalia. If she tolerates it well, we may adjust things to 4 half-hour feedings during the day, and only 7 1/2 or 8 hours of drip feeds at night. Or something.

But, we are home we are home we are home! No more trying to coordinate life from a hospital room, no more running back and forth across the bridge several times a day, no more worrying if she’s going to pick up another nasty virus while she’s getting ‘better’!

Now, to enjoy the week or so before we start all over with hospitals and get this baby born! LOL

My brother, Z, is turning 19 today!! I can’t believe it was that long ago! (Or that he’s married now, either! Ack!)

I was there the day he was born — was one of the first to hold him, too! That was the day I made the absolute decision I was NOT EVER going to give birth! Ewwww!!

(And yet, here I sit ready to do it for the 7^th time… what was I thinking???)

Anyway, Happy Birthday, Z! Hope its a good one!!

Well, its beginning to look like my injury was likely more ligament than probable break: I took the Vicodan they gave me in the Urgent Care twice yesterday (once in the evening, once at bedtime) and this morning I feel much better… not healed, but I’m not nearly so slow when I walk, and I can stand up without wincing.

I guess there is hope after all!!

Via Carol…

Dame Julian of Norwich wrote, back in the 14th century.

All shall be well.

And all shall be well.

And all manner of things shall be well.

And a quote she found on someone’s tagline…

Everything will be all right in the end. If it isn’t all right, this isn’t the end.

EK is still in the hospital, still with no absolute date for her release. She is off the IV (as a trial run; the heplock is still in place). The new Pulmonologist came on this morning (they switch every saturday; this is our third since she has been there). He is much more open to our doing liquid trials with her after we get home and before the feeding study. I am excited that he will likely be the discharging doctor, because his discharge orders sound like they will be a lot more liberal than either of the last two doctors.

So. She is making progress, but still we have no absolutes. Hard to plan when so much is in limbo!!

So. The midwives wanted to see me in Labor & Delivery. (They never did come in and see me, though). I went and was monitored for about 1/2 hour, and everything with Tiebreaker looks great. But they didn’t do anything to address my pain except to say to go home and relax.

Ummm… yeah.

So. I called the advice nurse, and she sent me to urgent care (different hospital), where the doctor decided that I have either pulled/torn the ligaments in my groin, or gotten a hairline fracture in the front of my pelvic bone. Since the treatment for both is the same (pain killers and take it easy for a few days) we opted to skip the xrays and just go for the painkillers and rest.

I picked up the kids from another babysitter, grabbed a few things for Fuul (I was going to switch places with him this afternoon, so he needed more stuff to be able to stay) and drove over to the hospital. The kids and I went in, but EK is aparently on full isolation now, so they stood outside her door and waved, and she so desperately wanted to get out there to them!

We just got home, someone is bringing in dinner, and I just took a Vicodan, so hopefully things will look a little rosier in a bit. (The kids think its already better, since they are now getting to play their beloved xbox!)

Is it 7-year-old boys, or is it just DS?

Lately, he has been trying the ‘do the absolutle minimum and see if you can get away with it’ thing, and it is getting so old!

He will do just enough of his homework to make it look like its done, but when I go over it, I will find things he omitted, or things he just plain skipped over, or just didn’t bother to do. This morning, I sent him to shower, and he did, but he didn’t even get all of his hair wet when he says he washed it. I sent him back to re-shower and re-wash his hair. One and a half minutes later, he was coming out with all of his hair wet, but I never heard the shower turned on, and I’m sure he could not have undressed, showered/washed, and redressed in that time. So, I sent him back again to get in the shower — undressed! — and wash his hair! (The water is actually running, and has been for about 2 minutes, which is enough time, I suppose).

When do they learn that its easier to just do it right the first time, and it takes a lot less time to do it that way?!

Well, I woke up this morning barely able to get out of bed. Took some more Tylenol, and have a call in to the midwives to find out if I need to be seen, or just muddle through.

This is absolutely just what I needed today: weekend, kids all our of school, EK still in the hospital, and no childcare planned as of yet. Perfect timing, yes??

So. Busy day. Probably did too much. But.

Tonight I was standing in my room taking off my shoes and talking to DA and JS. One little wobble, one ankle gives, and suddenly I am bouncing off my backside on the floor. Hard.

I’ve got a sore ankle, a really sore hip (it must have twisted during the fall), and a rather tender nether region where it all impacted.

Because, ya know, I needed something else today. Really. (I’m sure it will do wonders in the morning for my sore back, as well… maybe I’ll go hit the Tylenol now, and save myself the probable pain tomorrow. Or… that T3 in my backpack — the one prescribed for adhesion pain — is looking mighty nice about now.)

Update, 11:30pm
Oh, my. I was feeling ok, but then I moved. Owwieee!!! Made my way to the kitchen for some Tylenol, but it was a slow, tentative trip. Nothing that requires any quick jumping and running better happen around here tonight!